Rule # 1: In the Middle East, it is always the Arabs that attack first, and its always Israel who defends itself. This is called retaliation.

Rule # 2: The Arabs, whether Palestinians or Lebanese, are not allowed to kill Israelis. This is called terrorism.

Rule # 3: Israel has the right to kill Arab civilians, this is called self-defense, or these days collateral damage.

Rule # 4: When Israel kills too many civilians. The Western world calls for restraint. This is called the reaction of the international community.

Rule # 5: Palestinians and Lebanese do not have the right to capture Israeli military, not even a limited number, not even 1 or 2.

Rule # 6: Israel has the right to capture as many Palestinians as they want (Palestinians: around 10000 to date, 300 of which are children, Lebanese: 1000s to date, being held without trial). There is no limit; there is no need for proof of guilt or trial. All that is needed is the magic word: terrorism

Rule # 7: When you say Hezbollah, always be sure to add supported by Syria and Iran

Rule # 8: When you say Israel, never say supported by the USA, the UK and other European countries, for people (God forbid) might believe this is not an equal conflict.

Rule # 9: When it comes to Israel, dont mention the words occupied territories, UN resolutions, Geneva conventions. This could distress the audience of Fox.

Rule # 10: Israelis speak better English than Arabs. This is why we let them speak out as much as possible, so that they can explain rules 1 through 9. This is called neutral journalism.

Rule # 11: If you dont agree with these rules or if you favor the Arab side over the Israeli side, you must be a very dangerous anti-Semite. You may even have to make a public apology if you express your honest opinion (isn't democracy wonderful?)

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